All Sewed Up in Horse Pies

[pameladean]

I was walking innocently down the hall yesterday when I heard Raphael laughing uproariously. Cautious inquiry elicited a series of quotations from this article:

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/idiom_shortage_leaves_nation_all

I was a little surprised not to see it all over my friendslist. Possibly it is not to all tastes, but it still cracks me up every time I think of one of its unique phrases.


P.

Comments

a cast-iron piano tune unlike any on record

[faithhopetricks.livejournal.com]

I lost my voice, so I can't laugh, but that did make me produce some very hoarse screechy-cawing sounds that scared my cats.

Re: a cast-iron piano tune unlike any on record

[pameladean]

Oh dear, I'm sorry about your voice. But laughter is allegedly the best medicine. And cats are tough.

I can't remember the last time I laughed this much.

P.

[inlaterdays.livejournal.com]

This is an absolute oyster carnival. :) Love it.

[melusinehr.livejournal.com]

That final paragraph is brilliant.

[(Anonymous)]

I posted it, but it was as a comment in someone else's LJ. It didn't feel right to single it out doubly (pair it out?).

[guppiecat]

Grumble, this was me... stupid LJ timeout.

[darcydodo]

unless the cork and the bubble-truck tumble from the mountaintop

Suddenly I was put in mind of Uncle Wiggily.

[thinkum]

That piece put me into pepper-stacks of laughter. *g*

[shalanna.livejournal.com]

Wonderful! Article: creative and hilarious. But it also worried me. It made me think about how many times I've been advised to avoid all figurative language, be literal-minded when writing fiction, and to use NO similes or metaphors. That advice comes from three agents, albeit relatively new agents. I'm worried that regional expressions such as the Texanisms I treasure so much will be anathema, and won't be something you can even use to characterize someone in fiction. People seem to be abandoning the symbolic (except when it's presented in video.) Isn't it odd that I've been getting hit with that all month, and then this shows up? Synchronicity. But what is the clock trying to synchronize me with? I just don't like my writing without figurative language. It's like a--whoops, there I go again. I can't do without it, so maybe I should just shut up . . . *poof*

[shadowflyer.livejournal.com]

The colcannon is really going to hit the stand-up bass this time.

[serenejournal.livejournal.com]

Hilarious! Favorite line: "I don't know any other way to describe it."

[sovay]

Possibly it is not to all tastes, but it still cracks me up every time I think of one of its unique phrases.

I propose to introduce "oyster carnival" into the English mainstream. It's a true sally-hawker of a phrase.

[faeriemusicsmom.livejournal.com]

I find it particularly interesting that the gist of pretty much every sentence is clear, in spite of the flypaper marigolds not having a chance to waterfall.

[pameladean]

Yes, that one really seemed like the robin's top hat to me, too.

P.

[pameladean]

The same is true of your sentence. This is perhaps a little bit of a marrow-spinner, hmmm?

P.

[pameladean]

My favorite phrase. Maybe because of "The Walrus and the Carpenter," I'm not sure.

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[pameladean]

I KNOW. Who ARE those guys?

P.

[pameladean]

Tennis it up, maybe?

I really ought to have done what some commenters are doing and written a post in the same style, but I was laughing too hard.

P.

[pameladean]

Oh, yes, there is some influence from that quarter, isn't there? Hee.

P.

[pameladean]

*achoo*!

I want to write a book where everybody talks like that.

Then again, maybe I don't.

P.

[pameladean]

I can't do without either. I think those agents are nuts. You are so versatile, I wonder if you could utterly change genres to one where people haven't got these idiot notions.

P.

[pameladean]

*choke*

I think cabbage must be PARTICULARLY funny somehow. Or maybe it's basses.

P.

[pameladean]

Yes, that's just a tour-de-force of comic timing.

P.

[gypsy1969.livejournal.com]

More fun than a two-headed zebra in a snowstorm!

[fledgist.livejournal.com]

Chou think so?

[fledgist.livejournal.com]

No, it's just to much of a winter moth for that.

[prestonreytbla.livejournal.com]

Posted by: LJ pm March Comment 57 of 87 Well after spending a lot of time going out in Asia. Brisbane people do not dress up.

[xaviermahre.livejournal.com]

Posted on April at AM Mari wrote: Some people have class,some people have style. You have both, and it's fun to watch you in action.

[braindenison.livejournal.com]

So, basically, Grumble Grumble British Rail Grumble Grumble Too Hot Grumble Grumble British Weather Grumble Grumble Grumble.